Yesterday while commenting on my sister’s post, I called Mr. Gautam ugly & it was an instant reaction, but later on I didn’t like what I said. What makes a person ugly is his/her rottenness. Yeah it’s true some people work really hard to be labeled ugly & bitchy. Maybe they don’t know & it’s just a part of their nature.
I didn’t know Nafisa or Gautam & whatever I’ve read about Nafisa, it only indicates that she was a very sick person. One person or bad incident couldn’t have triggered her to end her life. It must have been variety of things. Naturally when a person has committed suicide, & when I look at one of the reasons, the only word that popped up was ugly.
Z & I also had this discussion on celebrities who died early. Some of them did take an overdose & died. One can’t call it suicide, cause when you can’t sleep & you are on drugs, you go on taking them as candies. It’s another thing some people die, & some don’t. You don’t want to end your life, you just want a good sleep. But whenever I read about such cases, I’ve noticed that people either don’t contribute or they make the victim feel bad. And this is not how you can convince anyone to give up on official drugs. In fact, in many cases, it’s the goodness & the so-called noble attitude of people that cause all the trouble. Compassion cannot be limited to the estimate of what you think is right & it’s the so-called noble attitude of bitchy & rotten people that make us call them ugly.
Last night I read something, which hasn’t much to do what I have been talking about. It is related to some extent.
‘But I’ll tell you what, there’s one thing I shall never understand till my dying day: what in the name of heaven did the fellow ever see in her?’
Yesterday I did fucking bad things & I literally have the urge to ask someone this question. You see when the person is rotten, bitchy & ugly, what could possibly make another person fall for that trash? The worst part about raising such questions is that we deteriorate every time we think about such stuff. It’s not just bad news. It’s fucking bad luck.
